Today is not a great day. Energy where are you?

I had to stop at the library on my walk today because my energy levels are just seriously lacking right now. I woke up with lower back ache. I got up and took my medication. I had breakfast but fell back to sleep until lunchtime. I haven’t felt awake at all today. Even after I’d slept a lot I still felt way too tired to move far. I forced myself to go for a walk because sometimes fresh air is helpful to actually feel awake. I say fresh air but probably a vast amount of pollution mixed in with that due to the cars out there. I have my Reflexology appointment tomorrow so I’m hoping that this will give me a boost. I don’t understand how I’m trying so hard to fix this anemia problem and it’s just not going away. I’ve even tried to sleep more to build up my energy again but it isn’t working.

I used to be so strong willed and never let things get me down. I was so good at fighting against anything required but I’ve lost the ability to do that. I’ve been wearing the same clothes (but clean underwear) the last three days because I have used any energy I have managed to build up doing things that are more important. I had to do the housework in chunks that I could do without getting too tired. I’ve still got stuff to do when I get home and I’m already tired thinking about those tasks. I am sure that I’ll feel better once things are decorated and made nicer than the current surroundings when it come to my flat. It doesn’t look that inviting at the moment and it will stay that way until I have the energy to clear everything out. Then I go for a walk around where I live and that is also a very depressing area. It would help if I lived in somewhere pretty and my flat was less scruffy. The cats always bring in bits which make me itch because I have stupidly sensitive skin. That is why I have a bath so much and change my bed covers once a week. That takes up excess energy that I don’t have right now though.

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3 thoughts on “Today is not a great day. Energy where are you?

  1. All your energy are belong to Mister. etc.

    You are remarkably pro-active for someone so convinced of their own idleness. I’m half tempted to post a transcript of that conversation here to remind you.

    You do seem rather burnt out at the moment. All this pressure you’re putting on yourself (even if some of it is just channelling other people’s opinions) must be making it unbearable. No wonder PDA is a thing.

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      1. Well yeah, let’s ignore those who aren’t worth the I can’t even be bothered etc, I mean I can see how all of that has really traumatised you. But you also seem to have very high standards and so much of what you do is cerebral, and there isn’t enough think to go round. Especially if it’s keeping you up half the night. I’m still getting used to that over-commitment concept myself and it explains so much. It’s easy for us to believe we’re lazy when that’s all we’ve been told but the truth is actually the opposite. Both of us have proven that to be the case, but sadly it seems we’re the last to believe it.

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